January 21, 2022

White Cup, Silver Cup

I have spent the past few weeks laser-focused on rituals – what they are, why we have them, the whole nine yards. Why? Well, I am teaching a workshop on “non-churchy” rituals for colleagues at Phillips Seminary in Tulsa next week, and I sure want…

October 7, 2021

A Tale of Two Ways

When I was in high school, we had to read “A Tale of Two Cities.” Upon completing the book, I was angry. I mean really, really mad. I’d just spent a week reading an entire book only to have **spoiler alert** the hero die at the end. In fact, I was so upset,…

September 23, 2021

What’s in a Name?

What’s in a name? A lot, actually. Names matter. Owning them, saying them, claiming them, changing them, even discarding them – names matter. In fact, they matter so much that there’s a ritualistic quality about naming things, isn’t…

September 10, 2021

Marriage is Choice

I hit publish with some apprehension a few weeks ago. I’d been sitting on “When It’s Over” for months, considering the risk of posting about divorce when my life’s work is marriage. But, to be honest, to talk candidly about marriage, we must talk…

September 2, 2021

Empty Nest

This week I become an empty nester. For most of my couples, this part of life is so far away it barely exists. I know I couldn’t have begun to fathom an empty nest when I was a young married person in my twenties. And when my mother-in-law would speak…

August 12, 2021

When It’s Over

Maybe it’s weird to have a blog about marriages ending on a wedding site. But maybe it’s not. Because you know what? Marriages end. So let’s talk about it. Mostly, let’s talk about that “until death do us part” line. Because that’s what we all get…

July 30, 2021


All language has baggage. It’s the nature of language. So, we adjust and shift, and try our best to rearrange language to better convey the truth beneath those pesky, heavy, baggage-laden words. It’s not always an easy or pretty process, but…

June 17, 2021

When It’s Hard

It’s been a month over here. Or wait. Really, it’s been a year . . . and yeah, I get that it is only June. And I get that last year was a piece of work. But 2021 has been a lot for our little family. Over the course of five months we have weathered… Read more »

May 14, 2021

Take Love for Granted

Take Love for Granted by Jack Ridl Assume it’s in the kitchen, under the couch, high in the pine tree out back, behind the paint cans in the garage. Don’t try proving your love is bigger than the Grand Canyon, the Milky Way, the urban…