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One of the most challenging aspects of this blog series has been the question of covenant versus contract. Marriage is one of them, but which one?  I thought this would be a quick and dirty blog: define and then defend. All with the goal of quickly circling back to our original question: Why do people […]

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News

As a systems-oriented marriage and family therapist, my short answer would be: because the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Creating something greater than ourselves is an intrinsically human goal. From the first cave dweller who painted their story on the wall to the astronauts who put a flag on the moon, […]

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Telling the Story of Marriage

“Why Marriage?” This was a particularly deep question, after my first marriage ended in divorce after 14 years. The new love of my life was, well, still new to me, so a very reasonable question to ask myself was, is this just a rebound? Will this marriage also end long before death do us part? […]

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News, Telling the Story of Marriage

Last week I publicly posed a question that I often privately ask my clients in the context of writing their marriage ceremonies. Why are you marrying? And much like the answers we’ve received from clients over the years, the responses to our blog post varied. However, we did have a particular cluster of responses around […]

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News, Telling the Story of Marriage

Why Marriage?

March 5, 2021

“Why are you getting married? Be specific.”  If I’ve married you, I’ve likely asked you this question. I might have even pushed a little bit, following up with: “We live in a time when marriage is neither required nor necessary in our society. So, why are you choosing it?” For years I have personally pondered […]

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News, Telling the Story of Marriage

OK, so there are two camps on V-Day . . . the one willing, and even happy to overspend on restaurants, make excuses for all of the extra chocolate (since it’s covering fruit), and pay for proposals in skywriting. Then there is Camp Cynic. The camp of those who side-eye the “holiday” and wonder what […]

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News

It’s February. Especially for those of us in the business of love, it means social media feeds full of pink and red hues, hearts, sweets, sparkly jewels, love sonnets, and tips on all sorts of romantic gestures one can undertake (particularly during a global pandemic). It’s the good ol’ market capitalizing on that delicious crush […]

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News

Slow Marriage

January 14, 2021

Several years ago I learned about The Slow Food movement. Have you heard of it? Founded by an Italian, its mission is to prevent the disappearance of local food cultures and traditions, counteract the rise of fast life, and combat our dwindling interest in the food we eat. There is much about the Slow Food […]

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News

The Turning of Time

January 1, 2021

The older I get, the more that time confounds me. This year has been eons long, but high school was just the other day. My children are just kids, but my oldest will enter her twenties in less than one month. In my mind, I am still a teenager . . . or at the […]

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News

With a global pandemic still raging, the role of “the gathered” at weddings has been altered. Our weddings in 2020 have been much smaller, incorporated Zoom, or simply been postponed. And almost always for the sake of community. Sure, elopements and micro-weddings are trending; understandably so. And they have their place. But what I find […]

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A Day in the Life, Premarital Advice, Telling the Story of Marriage

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